transitions

it will soon be time to pack bags, to deal with the heart breaking farewells and of getting rid of possessions.....this time though I am learning to cherish this journey.....visiting and revisiting the memories, friends and places....trying to take with me pieces to play back in my minds eye....the aha moments, the struggles, the challenges, the tears, the music, crazy dancing, protest marches, growing, the smiles, wisdom that I cherish and grew with as I was accepted as a part of the community here. I hope to keep these connections with me as I go on and walk new miles, meet new faces that will later become friends, strange places that will grow familiar, a new 'hood that will hopefully be home for a while.

Technical snags

I feel like I have been swamped a bad karma recently. My iphone has issues, my laptop got a crack, my work visa has been stalled as they did not find the federal id number for worcester roots which is very much active as per irs who kept me on hold for 2 hrs to answer a simple question. To top it all my car broke down and had smoke coming out like in movies. This might be big as the repair guy said that the engine doesn't sound too good. Winter's approaching which is pretty sometimes but really dark at other times. I do not know what are all these signs for?! Is it time for me to leave this country?

spring 2010

Highlights:

• swam in freezing cold water with cookie pie
• heard sandy, shaily, manku will be visiting me soon
• sama's getting cuter by the day
• bhindi/ okra sprouted! I dint think it grew in new england weather. Collard greens and lettuce are out of control. Rest of the veggies getting ready to bloom in the summer.
• bought a new camera (last one got stolen)

of a lil' bundle of a lot of joy!!

I've mentally written at least 7-8 blog entries over the last few months but did none for real. doing one finally

So this tiny bundle of joy came our way and is called sama. I probably will not see sama grow up everyday the next few years as I did see cookie as am not in hyderabad. I still feel I will have a special bond with her as she's sang's daughter and we are inseparably close. The two months I was there I stayed as home as much as I could partly cause I wanted to be around sama and sang and partly because it was much fun to do be home. It felt amazing to hold her close and rock her to sleep. It was magical to see gudiya take care of her lil' gudiya. I do not remember exactly how sang was as a baby as I am just a year older. It feels like she may just have been like sama as I see some of sang's childhood traits in sama, especially her shouting and bossing around. Sang does not do that now but I hope sama helps get some of her old habits back.

When sama came into this world ma, mala, sang's mil, cookie and i were on standing by the railing waiting impatiently. I remember of all the babies delivered sama was the loudest. We heard shout and knew she was born even b4 manoj, doc and nurse told us. It was not even crying believe me. she announced her arrival by shouting.

She has been a joy ever since. It was magical to see her move in when we put her for sun baths. I feel sad I wont see her everyday like I could see cookie pie.

Cookie pie's been my sweet heart ever since she was tiny. I remember the first time she put her head up, her first birthday, her first drive with us and a ton of other firsts. Cookie's always been tiny. I remember she wore a pair of shorts we got her when she was 2 until she was almost 6. I never thought she would grow up. Then suddenly I saw snaps of her in a half/sari and others that sang sent me and she looked grown up. This time when I went home after a long time I had an apprehension if our relation would still be the same. I know teenage kids do not really like grown ups and was scared it would get awkward. To my huge relief nothing changed. Coca was there to pick me with my bro' at 2 in the night stayed up until 6 in the morning and then we were at the hospital to welcome sama to this world.

It was fun to to get to know shaily, go on walks with her and be with pa and ma. Even though I have't been with Shaily for long I feel like I connect with her and am happy to see her gel in. It was nice to see to that sandy has become a lot more sensible and responsible but still has his fun side. I do feel a little anxious about pa and ma's health especially because I stay away. There were times I felt bad leaving rossie out but I kind of compensated that by talking him for walks. He made it easy to by not entering the room sama was in. Am glad that AKS still feels like home.

XOxo